Parties, bat poo and the perils of prickly plants
October 30th 2008 09:00
This is not poignant, poetic, political or anything even particularly productive. Today's blog was brought to you by the letter P.
I really don't have anything to say that may be of interest to anyone, these are just my random observations from my week in no particular order.
A whole weekend in a place with no mobile coverage is liberating (not to mention relaxing).
Cats go into a leg rubbing frenzy when you are wearing black and it is moulting season.
Fireflies use bioluminescence to attract mates which is extremely cool to watch. And on a girly note, they look like tiny fairies!
Beer and then sangria and then beer in copious amounts on a school night makes for a bloody fun night but a not so fun work hangover.
It's a lark in the park after dark.
Bat guano is hard to remove from your shoes.
Korean dumplings bought from a food court will always end in disaster.
When colouring your own hair don't start playing a computer game.
When colouring your own hair removing your T-shirt before applying the colour is probably a good idea.
Always use a professional colourist.
Computers are evil and Windows is the invention of Lucifer himself.
Bondi to Tamarama is a lovely place to have an outdoor sculpture exhibition.
Some art I just don't get.
When you really need to find something it will completely vanish.
I either have Alzheimer's or gremlins are hiding my stuff.
My apartment would have been a good place to hide Jimmy Hoffa.
Objects in the changing room mirror are actually as fat and lumpy as they appear.
Drag queen karaoke is not a great musical accompaniment for dinner.
Having cupcakes on your desk when you arrive for work is very nice.
You can kill a cactus.
Having a Flokati rug is like having a shedding goat for a pet. Plus, they get dirtier than a two dollar hooker – of course this is just supposition – I’ve never known nor have I ever been a two dollar hooker, I have no idea about their hygiene standards.
It is possible to be in three completely breakdowns in three days. My car broke down on the on-ramp to the Sydney Harbour Bridge (joy!), the same night my bus from the Brisbane airport broke down on the way to the city and I was so fed up I actually cried and then my cab broke down while racing to the theatre. This time I laughed at the pure absurdity. My companion didn’t quite get why I thought the breakdown was so hilarious.
The next breakdown will be my nervous one.
Slipping and falling while carrying a backpack and a handbag isn’t as difficult as it sounds but luckily I was fortunate enough to have my head break my fall on the lovely big glass wall on the way down.
You really do see stars when you are almost knocked unconscious.
When a woman drinks too much beer she is just as inclined to get a beer belly as a man. I have decided we are really a superhero team; I am Cisco and my belly is Pauncho my sidekick from south of the border.
Doctors can cancel your appointment by calling in sick.
It is probably a mistake to go party in a hotel room of your friends in a spur of the moment thing while wearing pyjamas and after you've taken your sleeping tablet. However it is entertaining. For others.
You can fall asleep midway while reaching for a lamp if you drink on top of taking sleeping tablets.
Some of these were recycled from my myspace blog, some are brand new observations. All are an exercise in complete narcissism
I really don't have anything to say that may be of interest to anyone, these are just my random observations from my week in no particular order.
A whole weekend in a place with no mobile coverage is liberating (not to mention relaxing).
Cats go into a leg rubbing frenzy when you are wearing black and it is moulting season.
Fireflies use bioluminescence to attract mates which is extremely cool to watch. And on a girly note, they look like tiny fairies!
Beer and then sangria and then beer in copious amounts on a school night makes for a bloody fun night but a not so fun work hangover.
It's a lark in the park after dark.
Bat guano is hard to remove from your shoes.
Korean dumplings bought from a food court will always end in disaster.
When colouring your own hair don't start playing a computer game.
When colouring your own hair removing your T-shirt before applying the colour is probably a good idea.
Always use a professional colourist.
Computers are evil and Windows is the invention of Lucifer himself.
Bondi to Tamarama is a lovely place to have an outdoor sculpture exhibition.
Some art I just don't get.
When you really need to find something it will completely vanish.
I either have Alzheimer's or gremlins are hiding my stuff.
My apartment would have been a good place to hide Jimmy Hoffa.
Objects in the changing room mirror are actually as fat and lumpy as they appear.
Drag queen karaoke is not a great musical accompaniment for dinner.
Having cupcakes on your desk when you arrive for work is very nice.
You can kill a cactus.
Having a Flokati rug is like having a shedding goat for a pet. Plus, they get dirtier than a two dollar hooker – of course this is just supposition – I’ve never known nor have I ever been a two dollar hooker, I have no idea about their hygiene standards.
It is possible to be in three completely breakdowns in three days. My car broke down on the on-ramp to the Sydney Harbour Bridge (joy!), the same night my bus from the Brisbane airport broke down on the way to the city and I was so fed up I actually cried and then my cab broke down while racing to the theatre. This time I laughed at the pure absurdity. My companion didn’t quite get why I thought the breakdown was so hilarious.
The next breakdown will be my nervous one.
Slipping and falling while carrying a backpack and a handbag isn’t as difficult as it sounds but luckily I was fortunate enough to have my head break my fall on the lovely big glass wall on the way down.
You really do see stars when you are almost knocked unconscious.
When a woman drinks too much beer she is just as inclined to get a beer belly as a man. I have decided we are really a superhero team; I am Cisco and my belly is Pauncho my sidekick from south of the border.
Doctors can cancel your appointment by calling in sick.
It is probably a mistake to go party in a hotel room of your friends in a spur of the moment thing while wearing pyjamas and after you've taken your sleeping tablet. However it is entertaining. For others.
You can fall asleep midway while reaching for a lamp if you drink on top of taking sleeping tablets.
Some of these were recycled from my myspace blog, some are brand new observations. All are an exercise in complete narcissism
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Comment by Morgan Bell
Deep Pencil
Business News
Movie Train
look im going to have to disagree with you on that one!
however your hair colouring tips were spot on!
Comment by Jason King
Sydney Table
Salty Popcorn
Total Randomness
My observation from the last couple of weeks.
If you go on holidays when you don't have enough money and spend your rent money while away it takes bloody weeks to catch up as every other debt piles in and American Express sends their mafia looking for you!
And try getting the bat guano off the car!!
Comment by Cheryl J
Rhythmatism
Budget Centsability
Hope you had a good holiday!
You should come and subscribe to my new blog BUDGET CENTSABILITY. I will be covering all sorts of ways to save money! I'll cover just about every subject eventually including the dreaded, but can't live without 'em, credit cards.
Thanks for stopping by.
Comment by Jason King
Sydney Table
Salty Popcorn
Total Randomness